March 19, 2011

I'm not ready and so aren't you

I tried chatting with her on MSN last night, but I could even tell I wasn't ready. I tried to make the conversation normal, but even I felt that there was some awkwardness in the "normality" of it. I had to keep the conversation really short - probably the shortest conversation I've had with anybody on MSN. Thank goodness I had help from my sis at that time to tell me to keep it real short since I've started, and also that I shouldn't have started.

Although very protective and careful, and putting up a strong guard, she at least replied. (Thanks.)

I'm not ready yet to talk to you normally, and neither are you prepared to accept me back as a friend. I don't know what you are thinking deep down inside, but I'm sure whatever it is, as long as I keep trying too hard, I'll only make the situation worse and force you to take drastic measures.

I felt that I should start somewhere because I have to see her in person on Monday at a meeting. It was unwise of me to have started the conversation, but like I said, I had to start somewhere..

It's too soon.. (So) Take it easy.. Take your time, the-girl-in-mind.

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